corgiproblemsBureau of Corgi Affairs
← RegistryCP-015Emotional

The Stare

It knows what you did. It is waiting for you to say it.

Manageable
Severity
Manageable
Onset
Whenever you eat without sharing, or exist without sharing.
Prognosis
Unaffected by treatment. Affects you deeply.
Reports on file
36,130

Section 1 · Presenting symptoms

  1. 1.1Unbroken eye contact from across the room
  2. 1.2Head slightly lowered, ears at full attention
  3. 1.3Occasional slow blink that reads as disappointment
  4. 1.4Staring through the shower curtain
  5. 1.5Staring at the exact spot on the couch where it is not currently allowed

Section 2 · Investigator's field note

The corgi's eyes are large, dark, and pointed at you. They are pointed at you right now. The Bureau has determined that the stare is a multipurpose tool: it requests food, expresses judgment, and reminds you of the time you said 'walk' and then took a phone call. It cannot be ignored. It can only be outlasted, and you will not outlast it.

Section 4 · Corroboration

Is this your household?

Add your report to the record. The Bureau counts each household once and believes you.

36,130 households affected